As parents, we spend A LOT of time working on manners with our little ones.
‘Say please.’
‘Say PLEASE.’
‘Saaaayyy P-L-E-A-S-E!!!!’
‘Pp ee aaaaass!’
Peas?
![](<iframe class="giphy-embed" src="https://giphy.com/embed/6wM4Zhs4h4PGo" width="480" height="348" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe>)
And so it goes on.
From the moment they coo their first ‘NO’ till. Well. Probably forever. Most of us will be there – when we can – reminding our offspring of their pleases and thank yous. *You’re doing a great job BTW!
However. I do think it’s high time that we put our own teaching into much better practice on ourselves. Because, it absolutely doesn’t cost a thing to say please or thank you in general passing. And, to also acknowledge someone when they say it to us. A ‘you’re welcome’ or even just a nod or smile is all that’s needed.
The simplest interactions seem to go out the window once we’ve left the coziness of our family homes. Now obviously not everyone throws their manners away on the way to work. But I reckon some do and possibly without even realising it.
*You know the examples coming right? *Oh yes… you know me well.
Every morning on my way to the tube station I say ‘thank you’ to the various London bus drivers that I cross paths with, as I get onto their buses over the week. The majority of them stare blankly *rudely? (into the oblivion) at me.
Some seem to have a fright that I’ve actually said ‘thank you’ and look a tad worried.
And the teeniest tiniest minority smile back. Possibly because their faces won’t let them not smile back. Smiling is contagious right?
At first I thought, you know what, I don’t blame them.
I have only ever heard one other person (occasionally) saying thank you to the bus drivers in the morning at my stop. One. It seems like a rare occurrence. And well…. they are not used to it right?
But actually wrong!! Wrong, wrong, wrong! If you don’t acknowledge a thank you, sooner or later the very VERY few people that do say thank you… will stop. Then we’re all as bad as each other?!
I’m not going to give up though. Because as sh*t as it is when I make Little Button also say thank you if we get on the bus together – and the bus driver blanks us both… there’s no way I’m going to allow her to grow up into a hard faced adult. The kind who stares blankly into the face of a well mannered person. Never says thank you. And certainly won’t say ‘you’re welcome’.
Food for thought perhaps? Absolutely. And as the old saying goes, don’t forget to mind your own manners! 😉
*I won’t be saying thank you to the bus driver who blinking shut me in the bus doors last week and laughed!!!
WILD is now out in Spanish!
WILD – Our debut children’s picture book
Dad blogger Ross Good from The Stented Papa is the official storyteller for WILD!
Happy book birthday WILD!
I have noticed a lot less people say it when they get off a plane than they used to…and I often forget to say please when ordering in a restaurant but I notice and add a hasty thank you instead – which is weird. Cos I do it all the time, rather than add the please next time….#Dreamteam
It’s easy to slip up when no one else is saying please and thank you around you in this type of environment I’d say. – Not weird at all. Thanks for stopping by x
I totally agree manners don’t cost a thing X #dreamteam
Exactly 🙂 Thanks Sam x
That’s so true now I think about it and it’s such a shame! I’m really hot on using manners and insisting my children do too because they are free, polite and create a more friendly world 🙂
Oh yes, they definitely help to create a better world x
I found your link party through the new inlinkz directory (so great that they have this now). It’s great discovering new blogs. I host a link-up too on Wednesdays and you’re welcome to join if you like.
Yes and hooray!
Civility doesn’t cost us a thing and takes so little effort.
It really does take so little effort. Thanks for stopping by Michele x
There are generally a lot less please and thank yous than there used to be, but sometimes I think it seems like people aren’t as helpful as they used to be. Few hours being held for the next person and the like – it’s just seems some people are too busy and it’s a shame. #dreamteam
Hi Ann, I too think being super busy puts a strain on things and perhaps changes the way people behave in the first place. Thanks for stopping by x
This whole blog post is on point and we should 100% be doing the same, they learn what we teach
Aww thanks so much Bryony x
Great point. It’s shocking really how uncaring or even rude we sometimes become amidst everyday stress. And who knows, someone might feel really low and a kind word or a smile from a stranger can make a difference… #dreamteam
Definitely this! You never know what someone might be going through – just a little smile can change things. x
Sometimes I feel very lucky to live in a small town in Norfolk where nearly everyone you see is super polite. Going to a city makes me realise that a lot of adults just don’t have good manners now.
I’ve noticed that too. The smaller villages and towns seem to be a huge deal more friendlier than the big cities x
I can’t believe how many people don’t say please, thank you and most of all excuse me – I’ve lost count of the amount of people I’ve had barge past me of late without an excuse me or sorry!
Oh yes! Excuse me! LOL – I can’t remember the last time someone said that during rush hour x
I am big on manners – they matter. I thank anyone who offers me a service or helps me or is kind. I hate how my OH barks orders and rarely utters please or thank you when he does so. Simple manners – important stuff. #DreamTeam
Ahhh you’ve summed it up perfectly Kate. Simple manners – important stuff. Thanks for stopping by x
Yes… it is important for us to practice what we preach. This week my husband told my daughter to wear a certain item of clothing and she was like, “but mum’s not! I wasn’t doing anything wrong but the point is…kids copy adults and in terms of manners, we need to set the example.
They really do don’t they. So double important we show off our super manners 😉 Thanks for popping over x
It really is annoying when bus drivers do that. A little manners goes a ong way. #DreamTeam
But do you know what… today a bus driver actually said ‘welcome’ with a nod and smile at me. I almost forgot I was on a bus – because I’m pretty sure that has NEVER happened before. LOL Thanks for popping in Enda 🙂
I’ve noticed this too and it really bothers me, especially when I’m out with my little boy (even though he can’t talk yet but I’m sure he’s taking everything in!!)
It’s very sad, especially when the little ones are watching this type of behaviour. x
My mummy and I say ‘hi’ and ‘good morning’ to people on the walk to school and the majority of them either grunt or whisper a ‘hi’ back. We’re always the ones to try and make eye contact and smile. It must be the world we’re living in, but a little bit of politeness or even an acknowledgement goes a long way! I suppose it depends whereabouts you are in the country as when we visit Northern Ireland everyone is so friendly! #DreamTeam
P.s Thank you for the BiBs vote x
Ahhh it’s so lovely you do this. It’s really awkward when you get blanked – but I also think that perhaps someone else will hear you saying ‘good morning’ or ‘thank you’ and copy. Then that’s two more being polite. Thanks for popping over xx
Manners cost nothing as they say. This is a pet peeve of mine. I was whinging the other day about the lack of reply to my “Good Mornings” in our office. Miserable people.
Great drawings by the way! #dreamteam
Ekk! A good morning back from work colleagues is a must. Thanks for popping in.
In Edinburgh, it’s very common to say thank you to the bus driver, at any time of day (you will sometimes hear people joke that it’s a criminal offence in Edinburgh not to say thank you). You can always tell who is not local, when they don’t say thank you. I always say good morning or good afternoon too when I get on the bus, but that’s just me.
I love that that’s a normal thing to do in Edinburgh x
I totally get this. You are right manners should be practised, but are often not. It is just rude and costs nothing xx
*Nods along. Exactly! Thanks for swinging by xx
I love your sketches! I don’t catch public transport very often at the moment, but when I do I always (or at least I think I do) use my manners. It is common courtesy! #DreamTeam
Awww thanks so much! Yup – manners should definitely be a normal thing x
It’s so true. My mum always says ‘It costs nothing to be nice’ and I have always thought the same way. But unfortunately I know exactly what you are talking about Annette, I’m sure a lot of us do. In my case I see it all the time when I am driving. I often stop to let a car out in front of me or stop to let a person cross the road and too many times you get no thanks or asknowledgement back. Very, very frustrating and disheartening..but like you I don’t want to become hard-faced so I’m going to keep on being nice – as much as I can! #dreamteam
Manners are so important. Up North is generally more polite than down South in my experience. That said I still have surprised looking bus drivers when I say thank you at my stop! #dreamteam
I actually find it impossible to get off the bus without saying thank you! It’s almost a reflex! i think it’s because almost everyone does it where I live. I know that if I got off without saying it, I’d be the topic of conversation amongst the rest of the passengers for the remainder of their bus journey! You’re right, manners cost nothing and just because other people are rude, we shouldn’t drop our standards (although you’re totally justified in doing so when it comes to the driver who shut you in the door!). #dreamteam
Perhaps it’s a London/big city thing as it’s certainly not the case where we are in Hove, where I often hear people say thank you on buses! I always insist the kids thank the driver too #DreamTeam
Manners cost nothing!! We should all try to remember that. Being polite is important. I am always amazed when people don’t say thankyou when I am driving and have stopped to let them go… #DreamTeam
Oh gosh, I always say thank you! It’s just common courtesy. My boys have been known to shout thank you through the letter box to the postie! #DreamTeam
I say keep on being polite but definitely NOT to the driver who smooshed you in the door. #DreamTeam